Monday 15th June 09

Today I was browsing the Internet for some little stories to share with you and found two beautiful little stories with great little morals which challenged and encouraged me and I hope you too.... So I will share them with you after a brief update...

Today I had my most intense physio session to date... I was surprised how much it set off my pain but its OK.... Its what its all about right?? I am feeling very tired lately of everything being a fight... Having to constantly push myself and everyone around me trying to push me, challenge me and critique me... I would love a 'weekend off' haha, some time away from it... Of course it wont happen because there is no way away from it or such thing as a break... But Hey, a girl can have dreams right?? tehehe... I really just wish I was better already..  but doesn't everyone walking through thick fogs of illness or such? lol... I guess its quite normal really... 

I had a lovely friend of mine visit today, as shes up here on holiday... It was soo cool... We had great chats! Wednesday I am going to go to my first movie since the accident and all this started with her... I'm at the point where I'm like 'stuff it' haha.. I will pay the price but I just want to have some sort of a life where I can... Get past the pain and do in despite of... So my friend Amie and I will go see a moves, eat popcorn and  have a fun afternoon... hehe... 

This Saturday I am having a 'Pancake Brunch', which Ive invited friends over for... I'm quite excited really... I just love having friends around and doing fun things... Going out if I can or spending time with others! I really can not wait til I'm once again independent... but small steps... its a very long, very hard road... but I'll get there!!

Well, this girl is a very tired one today so am going to try get some sleep... Enjoy the little stories... Love Kylee xxx

Precious Little Time.

The man came home from work late again, tired and irritated, to find his 5 year old son waiting for him at the door. Daddy, may I ask you a question?" "Yeah, sure, what is it?" replied the man. "Daddy, how much money do you make an hour?" "That's none of your business! What makes you ask such a thing?" the man said angrily. "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?" pleaded the little boy. "If you must know, I make $20.00 an hour." "Oh," the little boy replied, head bowed. Looking up, he said, "Daddy, may I borrow $10.00 please?" The father was furious. "If the only reason you wanted to know how much money I make is just so you can borrow some to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you're being so selfish. I work long, hard hours everyday and don't have time for such childish games." The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door. The man sat down and started to get even madder about the little boy's questioning. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money. After an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think he may have been a little hard on his son. Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $10.00, and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the Door of the little boy's room and opened the door. "Are you asleep son?" he asked. "No daddy, I'm awake," replied the boy. "I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier," said the man. "It's been a long day and I took my aggravation out on you. Here's that $10.00 you asked for." The little boy sat straight up, beaming. "Oh, thank you daddy!" he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow, he pulled out some more crumpled up bills. The man, since the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, then looked up at the man. "Why did you want more money if you already had some?" the father grumbled. "Because I didn't have enough, but now I do," the little boy replied. "Daddy, I have $20.00 now. Can I buy an hour of your time?" 
The Comfort Zone.

About 10 years ago, I started a job as a trainer for a Telemarketing agency. In one of my first classes the head trainer told a very motivating story that I would like to share with you.

He began by drawing a diagram of a stick man standing in the middle of a circle. To make it more interesting, he drew things like a house, a car, and a few friends inside the circle.

He asked the question "Can anyone tell me what this is?" In a long silence, one guy decided to throw out "the world?" The trainer said "That's close, this is your Comfort Zone. Inside your circle you have all the things that are important to you. Your home, your family, your friends, and your job. People feel that inside this circle they are safe from any danger or conflict.

"Can anyone tell me what happens when you step out of this circle?" A strong silence came over the room. The same eager guy abruptly announced "You are afraid". Another guy said "You make mistakes". The silence continued and the trainer smiled and said "When you make mistakes what can the result be?" The first guy shouts "You learn something."

"Exactly, you are learning." The trainer turned to the board and drew an arrow pointing from the stick man directly to the outside of the circle. He proceeded to say "When you leave your Comfort Zone you put yourself out there, in front of the world to be in a situations that you are not comfortable with. The end result is that you have learned something that you did not already know, you expand your knowledge to become a better person." He turned again to the board and drew a bigger circle around the original circle, and added a few new things like more friends, a bigger house etc.

"The moral of the story is that if you stay inside your Comfort Zone you will never be able to expand your horizons and learn. When you step out of your Comfort Zone you will eventually make your circle bigger, to challenge your mind and grow to be stronger, and all in all a better person."

Saturday 13 June 09

This morning I woke up and it was such a beautiful day outside... The sun was shining, not a cloud in the sky and the lake sparkled like it was glistened with thousands of sparkilng diamonds... What a way to wake up!! It was pure magic and rendered me speechless... The beauty around me ceases to amaze me! I love Taupo -- sooo much!! Its a beautiful place to live!!

I watched this amazing movie this morning called, 'The Unexpected Journey'.... Have you seen it? Ohh... I'm going to have to tell my sister about it... Its got a very young Zach Efron in it (the star of the 'High School Musical' moves... tween call?! hehe)... But seriously... He acted it incredibly well... All the kids that played the twins growing up did... Its not easy to play an autistic child... I'm sure!!! OK, Ill tell you a bit about it... Its a true story based on the devastation a mother experiences when her 2 twin boys are diagnosed with Autism (in the 80's??) and shes basically given no hope... Its a powerful movie on the unconditional love she has and how she fights for them and overcomes the obstacles with them, eventually setting up the 'Autism Awareness Society'... The kids acting the twin boys as they grow up is incredible for such young kids... right down to facial expressions... I certainly enjoyed it and recommend it... I love any movie that portrays a true life story or event!!

We had family stay last night which was a lot of fun and today is quiet... Ive done some more study and computer work which has been great - getting closer and closer to finishing!!

 My poor wee sister is soo sick... She was staying at a friends last night when mum received a txt early this morning asking her to come get her --- and bring towels!! Poor bubba has been throwing up with fevers and chills, aches and pains and generally feeling miserable... I hate it when shes sick... But she hasn't been sick like this for a long time.... She has started asking for food though... so that's a positive sign... Hopefully it will stay down! Shes curled up in Mum and Dads bed watching Sky (cable) TV and sleeping on and off... Hopefully it is just a 24 hour thing!! Shes got the better immune system of us kids - normally - lol....

This week is looking slightly quieter than the past 4 so we will hope and see how it evolves... You never know but we might get a relatively quiet week appointments and assessments wise... I mean we got physio, psychology, the doctor and WINZ... (haha, yes that's a quiet week at the moment) but hopefully no big assessments this week or much travelling! How novel??!! lol hehe.....

Well, we are planning a quiet afternoon and evening with yummy homemade chicken and vegetable soup tonnight! YUM!
Hope your day is treating you well, you are in my prayers... 
Each one of you... Love Kylee xxx

Life Changing Experiences

We touch the lives of others in ways we often never know. People sometimes come into our personal world for fleeting moments and can leave us forever changed. We have more power to create or to destroy than we can imagine. We can leave things or individuals better or worse than we found them. A look, a word, a gesture has tremendous impact and frequently we blither along through our existence unaware of the mighty power that our communication wields.

Here's an example:

It was a rainy, humid day: the mother of all bad hair days. I was riding on a bus downtown to go to work. The windows on the bus were covered in condensation so thick you couldn't see outside. Everyone was wilting. I was sitting next to a man in a business suit and didn't pay much attention until we both got off at the same stop and walked to the same newsstand to get a morning paper.

The man running the stand was obviously having a bad day. He was rude, abrupt and unsmiling as we purchased our papers, which served to only add more gloom to my day. The businessman caught my eye and smiled. He then proceeded to smile brightly, thank the newsstand proprietor for the paper and for being open on such a morning to make sure we were able to get our papers. In short, he expressed his appreciation for something most of us would take for granted.

The man running the newsstand responded only with a grunt and a sour expression. The businessman then pleasantly wished him a pleasant day.

As we turned away, I asked this man why he had continued to be pleasant to the newsman when he obviously didn't care about and didn't respond to his expression of appreciation and friendliness. The businessman grinned at me and said, "Why would I let someone else control what I say and what I feel or what kind of day I'm going to have?"

We then separated to go to our respective work places. To this day, I don't know who that business man was, where he worked, or anything else about him. I never saw him again, even though I looked for him on the bus on other days. He appeared briefly in my life and disappeared just as quickly. I don't even remember what he looked like. But I've never forgotten the words he said or the way his smile seemed like a shaft of light on a gloomy day.

That was a good 25 years ago, but the impact this had on my life has lasted. I never had a chance to thank him personally, but the way in which I try to choose to look at life as a result of those words is his legacy to me and my thanks to him.

Our interactions with the people we encounter can impact at least the next five people that person encounters. A smile and words of simple appreciation multiply themselves geometrically.

We cannot control people and situations that come to us, but we can always control our response to them. And in such positive decisions lie our control and personal power to make a positive difference. And it's something anyone and everyone can do. It is a real legacy that can impact both the present and the future.

Friday 12 June 09

Hey! Good Morning!
Have you guys seen 'Bride Wars'? I'm watching it now --- its a funny movie! I would recommend it!! Great movie! hehe....

I just love so much being able to get myself in and out of bed by myself! Its sooo good... who knew such a simple task could bring so much excitement and happiness... but lets face it... I'm easily excitable over pretty much anything... it takes very little to get me excited... those who know me well will laugh at that statement cause its soo true, I get excited over everything!! 

OK.... this 'Bride Wars' movie is really funny... hahaha... by the way.... lolz....

Today I have a friend coming over who has just moved up from the South Island to an hour away from us so shes coming with her 3 little kiddies to visit this afternoon... It will be great to catch up! We also have family coming to stay for the night as my little (20years old, not so lil) cousin is on his way up to Auckland to start learning to become a helicopter pilot... He has been crazy bout helicopters and flying since as long as I can remember... He used to play with trains and helicopter toys as a little kid and was always focused on becoming a pilot one day... So its cool to seeing him finally chase his dream!! It will be good catching up with family tonight!! 

Lauren has a friend over today... They are about to head into town but are stressing over what to do, what to wear, who to see and so on and so on... They're cute... Reminds me of when I was 13 ---- Everything is SUCH a big deal haha... 

Earlier a guy rang up for Lauren, of course Mum asked who it was... Why was a grown man ringing to talk to Lauren?? Well as soon as Mum found out she called for Lauren to get to the phone ASAP.... It was the guy from the music store ringing to let her know the new Jonas Brothers CD had come in and that he had a copy sitting there with her name on it...... Shes sooo excited!! Especially to learn she gets the first copy and its 4 days before the CD is being released in the states haha.... Shes always popping into the music store to get in and book the new CDs coming out (of her fav bands)... She really wants to try and get a job there... She would do well too because she loves music! Except shes only 13 and technically too young to work which really chunks her off... but she will grow up soon enough ... we all know that ... except of course when your 13! You feel like you'll never be old enough quick enough!! hahaha

Here is a story I found... which I thought I would share with you... Love Kylee xxx

Perhaps He Wanted To Encourage You

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. And every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color of the rainbow. Grand old trees graced the landscape, and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene. One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed. One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the world outside. Finally, he would have the joy of seeing it for himself. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."

Epilogue. . . .There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled. If you want to feel rich, just count all of the things you have that money can't buy. "Today is a gift, that's why it is called the present." 
--Author Unknown

Thursday 11th June 09 #2

*************** 2nd update of the day ***************


Today has been a very busy day already... and its only 2pm!
This morning after I got up and ready just as Mum was getting me down the stairs there was a knock at the door... 
... Phew!... Just in time... It was my physio... 
Whoops, I forgot to change times!! Luckily the Psychiatrist wasn't here till 10.40am... See he was going to be here between 10am to 10.30am, hehe... But Sarah (physio) and I got a good session in!! Straight into the next appointment!! 

To tell you the truth... it went extremely well!! Very much so!! He told me he was blown away with my strength, courage and attitude!! That's great coming from him!! Because of my complicated history, the complicated nature of CRPS and standard procedures for ACC I had to see him... Well he came to our house -- saved up another overnight trip to Hamilton!! I got on really well with him and he was very pleasant to talk to... 

His outcome was there were no signs of severe depression or other issues that he needs to be concerned over!! Sooo good!! Was great news!! I was honest with him... I had to go over my history (again for the umpteenth time) haha... I explained to him that I had my rough patches... Gosh, Id be lying if I said I never struggled or had my hard times... No one could go through such difficult circumstances, without struggling on some level with it.... So its all good... He thought I had my head on well and that I had a deeper self awareness than many others do... 
Ok, enough of that!! haha

My Occupational Therapist came soon after he left with all my equipment for upstairs! Yeha! I now have my bed raisers which improve many things, such as I can get out of bed easily, I can get into bed eaiser, and I can see out the window now too! Bonus! I have my bath step, and this thing that goes in your bed which means that you can easily sit up in bed and a bar that helps me to get out... I dont plan on having all the equipment forever but for the moment it helps soo much and will make life easier -- Give me more freedom and independance! What its all about huh?? :)

This afternoon I plan on trying to do a bit of study and reading if my eyes permit me and muck round with work on my computer... Yay!! Its the weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have a fantastic evening!! Love Kylee xxx

Thursday 11th June 09

Hey! Good morning!!
I'm excited to watch the counter go up... Ive been watching it for a few days now and I'm getting on average about 100 hits a day... Do you know how exciting that is for me?? I feel very humbled and excited! It sooooo cool!! 

Today I have another big assessment, so will have to get ready for that soon... Have a bath, do my makeup and so forth but the cool thing is that he is coming to my house! We thought we would have to go back to Hamilton for another overnight stay... But with knowing my difficulty in travelling he offered to visit at home... Very neat!! 

I'm able to get myself out of bed! By myself!! This is a new accomplishment for me... I'm also able to get my foot on the ground a bit more and am wearing my favourite shorts that are white and have a thick purple band around them, then purple butterflies up the left hand leg... I'm making progress... small steps forward... Ive had a rough week emotionally but I think that comes with battling this virus thing, whatever it is, and just have to continue to ride it out... Thank goodness though the virus never got really bad... Just been a right pain... no pun intended haha....

I just wanted to post a quick post though this morning... I spent a lot of last night awake... Ohh... One thing that did really strike me and peirce my heart deeply though is this... I share it with you with hesitation as it is really full on but In also feel its important and opened my eyes to the horror that takes place around us without even knowing --- Well, I didnt know...

Do you know there are kids that are being hung and excuted in Iran for going against the cutural beliefs... This young 16 year old girl got involved in a relationship outside of what would have been arranged, nothing had been set up yet, ... She was exicuted without the knowledge of her parents or lawyer, after being tried against a court... it isnt an isolated case either... this is happening time and time again - it isnt rare!!  Ill send you the video link... Its a music clip put together to raise awareness... I was literally in tears watching it... she was hung publicly, it doesnt show the hanging.... But can you even begin to imagine the horror?? The fear?? Can you imagine the pain the parents had to endure?? She was left hanging for days... Honestly it makes me feel sick and angry... I want to do something... Stop the injustice!! ARGH!

I cant do a lot but I can raise awareness so I want to share the clip with you and Id really encourage you to watch it... It just takes a few minutes but if we can create awareness maybe we can help bring about change... 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lFNx3n0MNM

I will update again later this afternoon... For now I have to go get ready... Love Kylee xxx

Wednesday 10th June 09

Ugh, I'm still sick, but Ive had a good day... Mums at work today so I decided to spend the day up in my bedroom and focus on my assignments and computer work! Its been successful despite being sick ---- I handed in my first assignment this morning! I was very proud of myself --- I'm excited to learn how I will do with it... I'm sure I wont hear back for a week or two... and I dont think it will be 'A' or 'A+' worthy, which is what I normally attain for but as things stand with everything going on I dont mind... I tried my best and as long as I pass I will be happy, but if I dont I will just redo it... so Im not too worried... its another step in the right direction! I even managed to get myself out of bed on my own, with no help, this afternoon, up into my walker... Very exciting! I'm pushing through for all the independence I can get! The CRPS is becoming more prominent in my right leg and arm pain wise but the sensitivity isn't as bad in my left leg... so I guess it balances itself out!

I'm thinking of doing a short certificate in food and safety after I finish the certificate in food and nutrition. See, the course would only be 30hours worth of study and is really cheap, so I figure it will keep me going til I see what happens with ACC (accident compensation)... I really want to get back to work so I dont want to take on anything too big study wise until I find out when I will get back... So this short couse will be just perfect, I think! haha.... 

Dad made a yummy slice yesterday which was a bit crumbly as he exchanged ingredients we didnt have for ones we did but its still really yummy, I certainly love it! Its a museli slice... So he used all the crumbs for a fruit crumble tonight... No waste... haha... 

Tomorrrow I have another big assessment to prepare for, so I will get ready for that too! Then its the weekend! Yeehaa! I want to do something again with some friends... Coffee or DVDs, or something... Ive realised how much I miss it, hanging with friends, being semi-normal... haha...

I found this really awesome little story which really touched me so thought I would share it with you too, I know I can relate it in ways such as trusting God when things arent going the way I hope or expect... Hope you have a great day! Bless ya! 
Love always, Kylee xxx

Learning Patience With God
My mother was dying of leukemia. My two older sisters, father, and I had shared the last three weeks in the hospital room with her. In two years, she had gone from a strong matriarch to a helpless invalid. 

For the last three days, she had been in a semi-conscious state of moaning and lifelessness. She could no longer speak through her dry, swollen lips. Her eyes had the blank void of a moonless midnight. 

On the night of the third day, I knew what I must do. I must cease being the selfish, clinging son. I sped purposefully to the chapel. There I gave God permission to take my mother. I could no longer stand to see her suffer, so I prayed for the permanent healing that only death can bring. 

I returned to the room with a peaceful heart for I knew by the next morning my mother would also be at peace. I had the best night's sleep in weeks. The next morning, as the sun broke through the window, I awoke. My first thoughts were, "It's over". But then a noise, a stirring directed my attention from the window to the bed. A small movement made me realize that my mother was still alive. It was all I could do to keep from screaming aloud, "God, how can You do this to me? I became a selfless son, and gave You permission to end this, and You still kept her in her misery." But before I could have exclaimed this, I was shocked to see that there was more than just a movement. 
My mother rolled onto her side, and looked into the glare of the newly risen sun. Then, as the sun made sparkling starbursts in her eyes, she licked her parched lips, and said "Gee, it's going to be a beautiful day today". Needless to say this got our attention quickly. Being the youngest, and fastest, I was first to her bedside. "Mom, it's me, Jerry, do you recognize me"? "Of course I do Jerry", she replied. 

We all took our turns talking to her. Other relatives came and were able to talk to her, as she answered not in her old voice, but rather in the voice of a child. The doctor's explanation was that the brain stem was being destroyed, accounting for the sudden change. It was a joyous day of laughing, and celebrating life with our family. That night we all went to sleep peacefully. 

The next morning, we were awaken to the stirring of angel's wings, and my mother was finally healed of her suffering. She had awakened to the Risen Son. 

The next few days were hectic with funeral plans. It was only after the funeral that I stopped to think of what had happened. If God had answered my prayer, in my time, in my way, my final memories of my mother would have been that of a helpless invalid, with void eyes, lying motionless in a deathbed. Instead, God answered my prayer in his time, in his omniscient way. 

Now, my memories of my mother are of a day of laughing and rejoicing. Since that time I have had many rocky roads. Financial failure. A divorce. The loss of my father. But throughout it all, regardless of how stormy the night might be, I know that through God's love, and perfect timing, I can awaken the next morning to a newly risen sun, or to the Risen Son, and say "Gee, it's going to be a beautiful day today." 
by Jerry L. Haynes

Tuesday 9th June 09

Today has been a busy day in many respects...
I'm feeling a bit better than I was (though still pretty lousy) but my pain seems to have re-flared up another level and the colour changes and swelling are once again prominent... Bummer... But we just got to keep trusting God that he knows best and will walk us through! It could just be with feeling off... Time will tell, I will keep you in the loop!

I had my occupational assessment this morning to see what work or job I could do then I go and see a doctor who tells me if I would be well enough or not to do any of the jobs listed of suggested... It went really well and was so cool because he used to be on the Supported Employment Board of members along side my boss at work for Supported Employment Agency... So he knew all about my job and so forth! He was also a christian so that was really cool! We had good chats! Wore me out though... But thats ok!!

I did get up and help Dad with baking my muesli slice that I eat... We cook up a big mixture, cut it into little squares and pop it in the freezer then when I am hungry I just munch on that... its really cool! Healthy, easy and yummy! And it doesn't freeze solid so you can pretty much eat it straight out of the freezer, which seems weird, but its not if that makes sense.... hahaha....

Tomorrow we have a few more appointments... One at WINZ and one at the Doctors as they aer changing over some of my bigger meds.... Laurens got music practice tonight, shes doing really well, I love hearing her practice downstairs on her keyboard and her singing is getting better too as is her dancing...

She did this little performance for us last night, it was soo super cute! You know the new Hannah Montana album? with Theres a song on there called the "Hoedown Throwdown Song"? Its an old country song they've made up to put on the new movie coming out, and they put line dancing actions to, its on youtube... its really cut... OK... I will find you the link so you can see it if you want... Here it is... 
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlnbmZK7GxU) 

So Lauren has been spending a lot of time learning the dance to that... Ohh its cute, I'm a fan, I loved it... hehe... shes way cute... she goes bright red with embarrassment when dancing but thats all a part of it...... awww.... hehe..... shes real good..... lol I'm biast though!! Of course!!

I have started a study with a friend on the word 'awesome'... We over use that word way to much so I wanted to learn it true and real meaning... As someone suggested this morning, I will start putting up bits and pieces of what I am learning along the way... So keep an eye out and I will take you along on the journey...Warning though... it goes much deeper than ever what my friend and I thought it would, we are having crazy, incredible revelations.... :)

Blessings to you from a house in Taupo... Love Kylee xxx


"Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it be only of myself."
Max Lucado

"You can no more blame your circumstances for your character than you can blame the mirror for the way you look."Anonymous 
"Character is a victory, not a gift." 
Anonymous