Wednesday 10th June 09

Ugh, I'm still sick, but Ive had a good day... Mums at work today so I decided to spend the day up in my bedroom and focus on my assignments and computer work! Its been successful despite being sick ---- I handed in my first assignment this morning! I was very proud of myself --- I'm excited to learn how I will do with it... I'm sure I wont hear back for a week or two... and I dont think it will be 'A' or 'A+' worthy, which is what I normally attain for but as things stand with everything going on I dont mind... I tried my best and as long as I pass I will be happy, but if I dont I will just redo it... so Im not too worried... its another step in the right direction! I even managed to get myself out of bed on my own, with no help, this afternoon, up into my walker... Very exciting! I'm pushing through for all the independence I can get! The CRPS is becoming more prominent in my right leg and arm pain wise but the sensitivity isn't as bad in my left leg... so I guess it balances itself out!

I'm thinking of doing a short certificate in food and safety after I finish the certificate in food and nutrition. See, the course would only be 30hours worth of study and is really cheap, so I figure it will keep me going til I see what happens with ACC (accident compensation)... I really want to get back to work so I dont want to take on anything too big study wise until I find out when I will get back... So this short couse will be just perfect, I think! haha.... 

Dad made a yummy slice yesterday which was a bit crumbly as he exchanged ingredients we didnt have for ones we did but its still really yummy, I certainly love it! Its a museli slice... So he used all the crumbs for a fruit crumble tonight... No waste... haha... 

Tomorrrow I have another big assessment to prepare for, so I will get ready for that too! Then its the weekend! Yeehaa! I want to do something again with some friends... Coffee or DVDs, or something... Ive realised how much I miss it, hanging with friends, being semi-normal... haha...

I found this really awesome little story which really touched me so thought I would share it with you too, I know I can relate it in ways such as trusting God when things arent going the way I hope or expect... Hope you have a great day! Bless ya! 
Love always, Kylee xxx

Learning Patience With God
My mother was dying of leukemia. My two older sisters, father, and I had shared the last three weeks in the hospital room with her. In two years, she had gone from a strong matriarch to a helpless invalid. 

For the last three days, she had been in a semi-conscious state of moaning and lifelessness. She could no longer speak through her dry, swollen lips. Her eyes had the blank void of a moonless midnight. 

On the night of the third day, I knew what I must do. I must cease being the selfish, clinging son. I sped purposefully to the chapel. There I gave God permission to take my mother. I could no longer stand to see her suffer, so I prayed for the permanent healing that only death can bring. 

I returned to the room with a peaceful heart for I knew by the next morning my mother would also be at peace. I had the best night's sleep in weeks. The next morning, as the sun broke through the window, I awoke. My first thoughts were, "It's over". But then a noise, a stirring directed my attention from the window to the bed. A small movement made me realize that my mother was still alive. It was all I could do to keep from screaming aloud, "God, how can You do this to me? I became a selfless son, and gave You permission to end this, and You still kept her in her misery." But before I could have exclaimed this, I was shocked to see that there was more than just a movement. 
My mother rolled onto her side, and looked into the glare of the newly risen sun. Then, as the sun made sparkling starbursts in her eyes, she licked her parched lips, and said "Gee, it's going to be a beautiful day today". Needless to say this got our attention quickly. Being the youngest, and fastest, I was first to her bedside. "Mom, it's me, Jerry, do you recognize me"? "Of course I do Jerry", she replied. 

We all took our turns talking to her. Other relatives came and were able to talk to her, as she answered not in her old voice, but rather in the voice of a child. The doctor's explanation was that the brain stem was being destroyed, accounting for the sudden change. It was a joyous day of laughing, and celebrating life with our family. That night we all went to sleep peacefully. 

The next morning, we were awaken to the stirring of angel's wings, and my mother was finally healed of her suffering. She had awakened to the Risen Son. 

The next few days were hectic with funeral plans. It was only after the funeral that I stopped to think of what had happened. If God had answered my prayer, in my time, in my way, my final memories of my mother would have been that of a helpless invalid, with void eyes, lying motionless in a deathbed. Instead, God answered my prayer in his time, in his omniscient way. 

Now, my memories of my mother are of a day of laughing and rejoicing. Since that time I have had many rocky roads. Financial failure. A divorce. The loss of my father. But throughout it all, regardless of how stormy the night might be, I know that through God's love, and perfect timing, I can awaken the next morning to a newly risen sun, or to the Risen Son, and say "Gee, it's going to be a beautiful day today." 
by Jerry L. Haynes